the past year and a half has been the most trying time of my life. between loss, pain, illness, & depression, i have reached the lowest points i have ever known. in the disaster that became my life i crumbled, in the mess i have become, i've destroyed anything good that has come my way. in the darkness i have come to know, my inability to see the light has caused me to hurt many people, some of whom i cared for very much, one i loved dearly. i see now that my bitterness, my pain is slowly killing me. i cannot fix anything around me because i, myself, am broken. i was once the rock, the mountain, everyone turned to me for support for strength. i have had people devote themselves to me, love me, look to me for guidence, but i have been drained, grown weak in my despair.
it has to end, now.
the phoenix is a mythological bird, a legendary creature that rises from the ashes of it's own destruction. so too shall i rise from my own ashes, i will find my strength again, i will be whole, complete once more. i will be better, stronger, more wise as i will be the man i once was, changed, improved by the the experiences i have been through, the hardships i have endured, the adversity i have overcome. today i start anew, so stand back and witness the magic as i take flight and soar among the heavens.